Things to Do, Say, Think, When Your Day Isn't Going So Well - A.K.A its a Sh*t Day
we all have bad days, below we share ways to have a ‘good bad’ day + turn that bad day around!
coping mechanisms shared below:
create your own personal tool kit / ritual
Your personal tool kit is a set of rituals or go-to activities that you enjoy and immediately uplift you. Create this and have it as a go-to when you’re in need to positivity and replenishment. Your tool kit is made up of rituals, practices, and activities that have the ability to shift your mood and perspective, and even provide a sense of escape for you. At any given point you may use all or some of these ‘go-to’s’ in your tool kit. Creating one, allows you to be organized mentally, in terms of having these ideas that are full proof - according to you and your preference - and ‘ready’ to grab as need, not having to find something to turn to in the moment.
Your personal tool kit can include things like:
Exercise
Yoga
Lighting a candle / burning a specific scent.
Listening to a specific playlist.
Prayers + meditating with spiritual words.
Motivating quotes.
A hobby/activity you enjoy.
Certain people you can ring up.
A nap.
Zoning out and making yourself a comfort meal [undisturbed cooking is therapeutic for many].
Going for a walk / bike ride.
A great cup of coffee/tea.
Going and sitting by a waterfront.
practice deep breathing / diaphragmatic breathing to be exact
Paying attention to your breathing, getting control of it, and accessing its pattern allows you to ensure you’re breathing properly. Often when we are stressed, our breaths become shorter. As simple as it sounds, those deeper, longer and more mindful breaths can do wonders. Diaphragmatic breathing also helps the parasympathetic nervous system, and at a deeper and holistic level, allows all the bad, trapped energy out!
WIM HOFF METHOD
Wim Hof, a.k.a. as The Ice Man, is a dutch athlete known for his extreme records, and his technique of diaphragmatic breathing and cold showers. A study showed that by using his method, “Wim was able to voluntarily influence his autonomic nervous system - something which until then was thought impossible.” If you want to hear more, check out The Skinny Confidential Episode here.
Benefits include stress management, immunity boost, and burnout recovery!
kundalini breathing
According to Harvard Medical School, “shallow breathing limits the diaphragm's range of motion. The lowest part of the lungs doesn't get a full share of oxygenated air. That can make you feel short of breath and anxious.” Deep breathing, allows for our lungs to be full and in turn feel relaxed. Another great technique for this is Kundalini breathing. Watch the clip below:
wash your face with cold water three - six times
Splashing water on your face, or washing your face, and even arms, was first brought to our attention from the spiritual and Islamic ritual of Wudu or Wudhoo. The spiritual wash pre-prayer and anger or anxiety management technique. Upon further investigation, we see that modern medicine does confirm that this is a technique of calming the nervous system, and in turn, slowing down your heart rate. The shock from cold water specifically allows your body to deal with this current shock and go into preservation mode. After learning more from the Wim Hof method, we can draw a parallel and see how this works as well! Those scenes in movies and TV shows did have a meaning behind them after all!
journal or write things down
The practice of journaling has made a comeback, and rightfully so. Even if you may not journal regularly, on a bad day, it can be very helpful! Writing down your thoughts, concerns, and negative points can help get it out of your head and onto paper. If there are concerns that you want to come back to, you can, and you don’t have to walk around with it weighing you down in your head, but now it’s on paper, and it’s there when you need to refer back to it. Even throwing away that piece of paper or burning it, is therapeutic and has a positive effect - according to a 2011 study published in Psychology Science.
pray / recite / talk to God
Praying to a bigger being, to the One that knows everything and is in charge of everything, can be very helpful. If you believe and recognize that God is giving you your problems/challenges and your good days, and is capable of providing you with relief and the capacity to deal with the crap that life has thrown at you that day, then go ahead and talk to God, recite prayers that remind you of your capability, and ask for relief. If this is the path that speaks to you, you will definitely feel a sense of faith, relief and upliftment.
practice earthing
Earthing is literally a grounding practice. Simply walking or sitting barefoot outdoors, allows you to reconnect with the Earth’s electrons and balance yours out - this is often missed out in our modern lifestyle. Research + studies have confirmed:
Reduction in inflammation
Better sleep
Decreased stressed
Stress reduction
Pain reduction
Meditate
Do we need to say more? An age-old practice that reduces anxiety, enhances self awareness, and promotes your emotional health. We’ve even done a post on the ABC’s of Meditation here.
Some great go to apps we recommend are:
Southeast ASMR on Apple Podcasts!
Melissa Wood Health guided meditations
workout to some loud jams or a kick-a** podcast
Sometimes you need to release those endorphins with a feel good workout. It can be boxing, it can be a HIIT workout with a fast paced playlist, or a motivating and emotion filled podcast! Go for it.
take a walk
Walking can help you pace and process through your thoughts. Walking outdoors and breathing in fresh air, being in the sunlight, or walking through a nature filled trail can all be so therapeutic. If you prefer waterfront views, walk by a pier or beach and that change of scenery can do wonders.
step outdoors / especially in the sun
On that note even just stepping outside your home/building, on your balcony or patio, those 30 minutes, or however many minutes you have or can carve out - can give you a replenishing Vitamin D boost and leave you feeling refreshed.
watch something funny / classics are always safe
Sometimes all you need is a good laugh. Classic shows or movies are always a great go-to option if that is your thing. You are guaranteed a laugh and have a serotonin boost!
take a drive
For some it may not be a walk, it may be a drive. Or you might alternate between the two options. A drive while listening to a calming sound or on a call with someone, or just in silence, can allow time to both have a change of scenery, feel the movement of energy, and time to process or to disconnect.
hydrate
Another technique that sounds so simple, but is SO important, both for your physical and mental health, is hydration! It is a basic need for our bodies to function well and so making sure we are well hydrated can allow for better blood flow, better energy and strengthen your adrenal glands.
sit in a relaxing yoga postition
If yoga is not part of your tool kit to deal with anxiety, stress, or a bad day. Perhaps try some of these go to poses that help release tension, move energy within the body, and help relax - similar to just laying down.
Savasana - lying down on your back, use pillows under your lower back if needed or knees. open up like a starfish, comfortable, and just breath and be.
Happy Baby - lying down on your back, bringing your knees towards your underarms, neck + head on the floor, hold your feet from the side facing out and just open up your hips, and let any tension go - energizing your body.
Legs up on the wall - we’ve mentioned this before - here - allowing blood to flow back to your heart, and relaxing at the same time, releasing tension in tired legs too.
Child’s pose - this position stretches the thighs, hips and ankles and helps relax the body and mind. Kneeling down, stretch your knees as wide as your mat, or a little wider than your hips, kneel down and forehead to the ground. Arms can stretch out in front.
Cobbler pose with a forward fold - almost like a butterfly stretch. Sitting, keeping your spine long, the backs of your feet meet each other, wiggle for comfort and release of energy, and fold forward if you feel like it.
Forward fold - legs together, straight out, and fold your body over in half, hold the bottoms of your feet, or your big toe if possible.
Hold a Piece of Ice
If you’re anxious the ice will distract your mind! Give it a try!
Hold a healing stone / or two
Similar to earthing, healing stones can absorb negative energy. Quartz, selenite, black tourmaline and amethyst are great go-tos for beginners in their healing crystal adaption. Hold them, make an intension, release your energy into them. Cleanse them under a tap of running water, or in the sun light.
light a candle
Ambient and therapeutic. Scents and the vision of a lit candle can be so uplifting and cozy. Perhaps while you workout, journal, watch tv, or enjoy a cup of coffee! Try to keep it non-toxic!
take an awesome nap
Enough said!
Vent
Vent to your close friend, your mom, your dad, your partner, sibling, whoever it may be. If you have no one you can call, remember you can always journal, vent to God, or practice the above methods while processing your thoughts. If therapy is accessible to you, we always recommend this practice and know it can do wonders!
List things you are grateful for
Gratitude is scientifically proven to rewire your brain. Not to minimize the effect of your problems or bad days - we are not shoving them under a rug, but remembering the positive things in your life can do wonders!
send love to specific people in your head + make a donation
Sending love to people in your life, be specific, even if you do not talk to them, can be rewarding and uplifting. Being in a positive state of mind, similar to the gratitude practice, and sending out unconditional love draws a parallel from the concept of whatever energy you put out you will get back. Making a donation, similarly, is rewarding from the ‘good human’ side off you. Knowing you’ve made a little difference to someone’s life in a positive way, that was otherwise relatively helpless. Helping something good come out of your thus-far bad day.
reflect
Reflecting is a great way to process through your thoughts. Above, some of the shared coping mechanisms integrate and overlap with this too. Reflecting on what changes need to be made OR what needs to improve, OR self awareness on how you absorb energy and deal with issues. This practice is encouraged daily, and more so on-demand when a bad day arises.
remember everything happens for a reason
In hindsight remember that good or bad, once something has happened , it has happened. You may learn, grown, reflect but something had to come out of it. Life throws you curve balls, to keep it interesting 😜, and there’s nothing you’re given by life that you cannot handle. Remember that!
digital detox
Switching off from the world - in a calculated way - of course being mindful of old parents, or far-away family and friends as needed. Sending them a message that you’re relaxing for a few hours and switching off from digital connections can be helpful. Or perhaps it’s just social media that you need to disconnect from. Even if you do not feel these sources are sources of anxiety to you, its nonetheless a source of stimulation, and often we just need to not be stimulated!
order pizza and watch tv
Classic and always encouraged [😉] for a feel good, replenishing night/day - pizza and a good movie or TV show!
