What If Your Job Might Be Bad For You?
A Gallup poll highlighted that 60-85% of the world doesn’t like their job, is not engaged at work, and simply put, checked out. It is not uncommon for us to have someone we know in our life, if not ourselves, or even just heard of people, who share this mindset. This is unfortunate and sad, for our own wellbeing as well as the world’s workplace in general. We talk to Renee Welde, M.S., LPC, BCC, a holistic counselor, and Licensed Professional Counselor, National Board Certified Coach, Educator and Speaker with a focus on solution-based coaching, specializing in life transition and career paths.
[spoiler alert: free consultation referral at the end of the article]
Recognizing We Are Not Where We Should Be
Renee highlights that “we go through life transitions our whole life”, meaning, there are different phases in our life and different stages we go through. Sometimes we are in a situation we love, and then in one not so much, or vice-versa, where we go from something we hate to something better. Sometimes, it’s as simple as just a change in some part of our life, because that is life. For example we go from working full time, to a new job - being a mom, dad, or caretaker, full time. Change affects people differently, whichever way you feel is okay, as long as you find ways to manage/deal with it.
Photo Hello I'm Nik on Unsplash
need to recognize how we feel, if we need to pivot to something better
In the example of a situation similar that to a new parent, or an individual that has transitioned into a new phase, but does not quite feel like themselves… Renee highlights that “There are different transitions, but it is still a job. Maybe you have to do something different, or a side hustle to feel more like yourself” in the case you recognize you are not 100% satisfied or happy. [side note on gratitude of a situation below].
signs we are not happy in our job
““Our thoughts create our feelings. create our actions, create results.””
Renee points out that you should reflect on yourself and see “‘what are you thinking?'. Is it hard to get out of bed in the morning? Do you feel sad, depressed, unfulfilled?”
You might even notice you '“sleeping patterns change. See how you feel”.
Why Is It Bad For You
Anything negative would be bad for you - bad vibes, bad energy, no thanks.
If you are in a job/situation where you are not happy, “you will feel depressed, anxious, sad, overwhelmed, and even feel like you are in a rut” highlights Renee. You want to change this for your wellbeing, better mental health state, a better world, a better relationship partner, better family member.
Is It Your Job, Boss, Colleagues, or Industry That you Hate?
Renee advises taking a step back and reflecting on your situation. An anecdote she shares helps illustrate this. One of Renee’s clients who at her core loved nursing, hated her job. The individual noticed after some time, it wasn’t the industry, it was the specific location she was at, where colleagues asked her to punch in at the wrong times and other tasks that were completely misaligned with her values. She didn’t like it, she didn’t feel right. Once she got a nursing job at another location, she had remembered that she really did love the job itself.
Think about what your values are [more on that below] and where the misalignment is. Often if you are doing something you have a passion for or enjoy, it could simply be the environment you are currently in that is not the right situation, and not aligned with your values - “try to pinpoint on what is actually upsetting you” - the environment, the person, or the industry. Alternatively, you might also be in a different stage of life, and therefore need to transition into a new passion/industry/talent.
Photo: Mervyn Chan
But Realistically I Can’t Just Quit, Change Jobs?!
To navigate this answer, the answers below are broken down into smaller sections, where we discuss how to navigate realistically changing your situation, and then how to think about your career development - whether you are making a change or just starting out.
transitioning realistically
If you have recognized that you hate your job [whether its the job/industry itself, or the environment], take a deep breath and think of the following, as Renee advises:
Every job that we have, we are gaining skills.
Right now you cannot move, because of commitments, but
I am the #1 investor in me.
What can I do so I can change my mindset?
I will give it my all.
Make it temporary, there is always a way.
Recognize who you are - what do you want?
We all change, what do you want? Study your life
It has been scientifically proven that the happiest people are those that are:
A compelling and exciting part of your future to look forward to
Gratitude - being grateful for where you are
Maintain a happy attitude and knowing that you can pivot towards something better, look forward to that, while being grateful for whatever you have so far.
While revising + setting up, career development
Go over what your values are, figure out what you want to be doing, what your life entails, and what needs to be done. This is great advice for those just starting out too.
Renee shares that with her time in specifically helping people simply do career development, a huge and majority of the part of figuring out your career path is understanding you! So to break down the process:
Self Assessment - Figuring out YOU - your values, strengths, weaknesses, talents/gifts, life, commitments, environments, life purpose.
Career Exploration - Brainstorm possibilities, research at career centers or libraries, talk to people in industries that you’re curious about, network, have informational interviews, visit workplaces to get a feel for what certain jobs entail
Setting Goals, Decision Making - Evaluate the information you have gathered about yourself and the world of work. If you have unresolved personal issues that need to be addressed before making the career decision, hire a career counselor or another qualified professional to help you.
Make an Action Plan - varies from person to person. For some people, it may be enrolling in school, for others it’s an internship, for others, it’s learning full time job hunting skills.
Implement the Action Plan - Go for it, you did the thinking, the research, now plan and play out your career path.
Use this process to navigate your change or start off a career path.
support is a big part of change + life
You do not have to make it out on your own [as we are often made to beleive]. We are all humans, “we all need each other” Renee reminds us.
Talk to a career counselor, life coach, a good friend, network. Pull in that support and brainstorm.
If you have had a loss, it can completely misalign you, whether it’s your own illness, a family or close friend, a loss in your workplace - know that humans are resilient, “hang in there, there is always renewal - this is where support is good for us!”
Photo: Vonecia Carswell
Change Is Normal But Not Easy
“We are always growing and changing at different times of our lives.” highlights Renee “In today’s society, we don’t stay in one company for 20 years like our parents. We always think about if we are fulfilled, or maybe it’s time to transition”.
Renee explains that “excitement and fear feel the same in the body” and change is often accompanied with fear as we might not know all the ways, we might not feel competent, or we might have certain expectations - of course, it's something new.
However, part of the vision process does require a period of courage. Renee highlights that we often forget about this and do not talk about this part enough. “we have to commit to a vision, and have to go through the period of courage, and we will get competent. Many people want to feel confident and competent at the start, and just don’t do it as a result of fear”. Renee does not encourage this, and says while you commit to this vision “have the plan, and have the support” and reassures that you will get competent.
Photo: Alexander Mils
Renee is offering ARISTOS readers a free personal or career consultation on ZOOM. To set it up, email Renee directly at reneewelde1@gmail.com or call (646) 392-8885, to set up an appointment, referring Aristos. Disclaimer: your confidentiality will be maintained, your name will not be shared with Aristos, just let Renee know you are reaching out via this post.
